Living in this world can leave some pretty deep scars on our heart, and learning how to fully heal these scars and release the pain that is beneath them is possibly the most challenging thing a human being could ever have to do in life.

But it is a challenge worth rising to, because the rewards are profound and will bring us closer to living the life of love, happiness, fulfilment, purpose and joy that we are destined to enjoy. This is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, and the rewards are very real. But we do not have to reach a mythical destination to find them; we experience them as we are making the journey. Every little step we take helps us to become freer, stronger, happier, and more connected to the deep beauty of life, which is essentially Love.

But this journey cannot be rushed, because healing is one of the most gradual and lengthy processes we must go through in life. It needs to be, because of the fragility and extreme sensitivity of the human heart. It’s like doing a surgical operation in which you are removing lots of tiny little shards of broken glass from a part of the body. You must be very, very careful, and take all the time you need to delicately extricate every tiny shard of spiky glass, otherwise you will simply cause further pain and damage.

Throughout the process of our healing journey we must be very patient with ourselves because it is not easy and we are going to falter. We will repeatedly fall back into our pain and our dysfunction. We will feel hopeless and beyond salvation at times. We will want to completely disconnect from everyone and everything, and retreat into a cocoon of complete self-isolation and self-protection; our only prerogative being to avoiding further pain at all costs.

The obvious danger in this scenario is that we become cut-off, self-destructive, pushing people away, and retreating further into the darker realms of our own mind. Our thoughts can quite easily convince us that we would be better off removing ourselves from this earthly reality, and ending our life. I myself lived in this dark place for several years in my late teens, attempting suicide on at least two occasions.

So its important to be fully aware of the dangers of completely isolating ourselves and pushing everyone away. We actually become weaker when we disconnect from other human beings, and it’s important to recognise that the love, care and concern of another human being might sometimes be the only thing that will rescue us out of our dark pit. We should never, ever push love away because love is the only thing that can heal us. Slowly but surely, it is healing us all. Love is like the waves that lap against the cliff face, slowly eroding the rock-solid barrier in front of them. Love is the most persistent and patient force in the universe. It will never leave you alone.

The recognition of the existence love, not just in other people but all around you and within your own heart, is what will save you, give you courage and restore your faith and trust. The recognition of love’s ever-presence is what will bring the light back into your eyes, the warmth back into your bones, and joy and passion back into your heart, slowly but surely.

Love surrounds each one of us, all of the time, but of course we have to let it into our heart. And just as importantly, we have to open up to the love and warmth of other people too, because human beings need each other. We support each other, strengthen each other, reassure each other. This is why prolonged isolation is not good for us, because our heart naturally wants to connect with other hearts. We get great strength and joy from these human connections. We are not meant to live in isolation.

But the greatest challenge we face is not opening our door to other people, but opening our heart to the love that exists inside of us, that is constantly lapping against the barriers we have constructed around our heart. It wants to heal us, soothe us and revive us. We close our heart and build a protective wall around it because we believe it will prevent further pain. And in a way, this is true, because an open heart is a vulnerable heart. But in the process of trying to prevent further pain, we actually prevent our heart from feeling anything, and this is why it starts to grow weak. Our heart must feel, because that is it’s function. Without feeling, our heart no longer has a purpose.

So we have this dilemma… do we want to feel, or don’t we ? Or the better question to ask ourselves is this: Do we want our heart to wither and fade, like a forgotten and neglected flower, no longer receiving water and sunlight? or do we want to water it and watch it to blossom and grow?

Because your heart is like the most beautiful flower that has ever existed in this universe. It is truly unique, and it is glorious and beautiful beyond words when it opens its petals. You personally have been entrusted with the care of this magnificent flower, and you have the freedom to choose to help it flourish, blossom and express its profound beauty, or to deny it what it desperately needs and watch it wither away, lose its petals and die. This is the most important choice you have to make in life, and every day we must act in accordance with this choice, because our heart always requires our attention. In truth, no-one wants their heart to wither but we give up believing that it can be fully restored. We keep it alive, but don’t give it what it really needs to be strong and healthy.

Knowing how deeply precious and magnificent this flower is, and knowing how desperately it wants to grow, blossom and share it’s exquisite beauty with the world makes us feel very protective of this flower. It motivates us to care for it, feed it and help it fulfil its potential of sharing its divine scent and divine beauty with the world.

All who see this flower will be in awe of its beauty. It will move their heart, and encourage them to want to show the same love and care towards the beautiful flower which they have been entrusted with. The greatest tragedy in this world in neglecting the flower you have been entrusted with, and allowing it to perish. Because it is the greatest gift in the universe. The responsibility to care for it is the greatest honour. As human beings with a heart, we have all been given this amazing gift and this great honour.

And because it is your job to nurture and protect this flower, you can decide what kind of influences you want keep away from it. For example, people who don’t care about flowers should be kept at arms length. You decide in which environments to place this flower. Environments which are too harsh for it should be avoided. You can choose, and observe the consequences of all your choices.

How does the flower respond when it is in this environment or that environment? How does it respond when it is around these types of people, or those types of people? You are the caretaker, the protector, the guardian of the most precious thing in the universe: your heart. Do everything you can to give it the ideal environment in which it can flourish, and grow, open up and express its beauty.

Be in more natural environments where there are no harsh sounds, sights and smells, but more peace, beauty and stillness. You belong amidst nature, in the presence of birdsong, trees, flowers, grass, rivers and mountains. Be in kinder social environments, where there is no judgement, no meanness, aggression or insensitivity. You belong among sensitive people, who see your value, who want to listen to your voice, and support you to heal and shine your light.

When you realise that you are the sole protector and guardian of your heart, and that no-one else can do this job for you, you become more ruthless about the environments you subject yourself to. When you realise what your heart really needs, you raise your standards dramatically and do not feel inclined to compromise them. Because if your heart suffers, you suffer.

As your heart gets used to being more open, and as it grows in wisdom by learning from past painful experiences, it develops a radar for things that will be harmful to it. It will speak to us through intuition and feelings, and tell us to avoid certain situations, certain people, certain environments. It is very important we listen to this communication if we wish to avoid more painful experiences. If we listen to our heart’s intuition carefully, irrespective of who we may upset by doing so, we will become more self-assured, more confident, more outgoing and more open. Because in truth, it gives us a great sense of freedom to be an open book, to be transparent, because it means we can truly be ourself without all the defences, barriers and masks that require SO much effort and energy to uphold. We can be free, open, honest and direct, without guilt or apology, because we know we are behaving in a way that most benefits our heart, and consequently, the hearts of those around us.

Because as we learn how sensitive the human heart truly is and how carefully it needs to be treated, we can be the kind of person that other hearts want to be around. We can be a gentle person, that other people feel safe to be open around, knowing that they will not be judged or criticised. Knowing that you will listen to them and strive to understand them. You will be a blessing to be around, because you care as much about the hearts of others as you do your own. This is selflessness, this is when we become one, moved by love. When I value your heart as much as you value it, then the power of love unites us and nothing can ever get in the way of that.

This is the potential for the human race, as brothers and sisters who realise the profound value of every human heart, and who live, speak and act in the best interest of all the hearts around them. The first step is to become fully acquainted with your own heart, so that you can understand the hearts of others.

And it is for this reason that pain has a valuable part to play in our lives. We learn so much about ourselves as we go through the healing process. We realise how sensitive the human heart truly is, and what it truly needs and doesn’t need. Pain and healing are an integral part of life on Earth, and although none of us would willingly choose painful experiences, we can appreciate the role they have to play in making us stronger, wiser and more compassionate. Because only when we know how it feels to be broken can we truly appreciate how magnificent it feels to be whole again.

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