Irrespective of whether or not you are a Christian, we all have the capacity to develop our heart to the degree that Jesus did. We each have a heart that is capable of being strong yet gentle, of forgiving all people, forgiving all transgressions, understanding the hearts of all others, and seeing the suffering individual behind all acts of greed or malevolence.

This last one – the ability to see past someone’s antisocial behaviour and understand that they are wounded inside – is one of the most important. Many of us have expectations about how others should behave, and if they transgress we can become angry and judgmental very easily. But there are many people in this world who have experienced pain and suffering that we cannot comprehend. It is often suffering that drives such people to hatred, hostility and even violence. Should we judge those people as ‘bad’? It would be far wiser to view them as wounded, because that is the truest perspective on the situation. A wounded person can be healed, through genuine forgiveness, compassion and love.

However, conventional thinking tells us that a bad person should be punished, until they can become a ‘good’ person, but in reality this is rarely the case. Punishment often creates anger and bitterness, and rarely heals a wounded soul. There are many wounded souls in this world, as we all know.

Change your perspective about all people, including yourself. Seek to truly understand what is at the root of people’s behaviour; what is the cause? You are not bad and they are not bad. If you decide that they are ‘bad’, then you will be condemning yourself also, and it is vital you don’t don’t this. You need your compassion, as much as everybody else does. We have all been conditioned by a society that is – to a large degree – not good for our heart, and our heart is the centre of our being. Our heart has been neglected and hurt. Our heart became afraid by what it perceived as a threatening and unstable world, and thus insecurity took root on the deepest level.

It is this we need to address, as it is the root cause of all our dysfunction. We need to rediscover our security, our sense of feeling safe in this world. Every living creature needs to feel safe; it is one of the most primal needs that we all share. Once we feel safe, we relax inside and we can actually enjoy being alive. But if we do not feel safe, if we feel anxious and tense, then we will not truly enjoy anything until we finally find a way to relax and let go of our anxiety.

This is the most important thing to address in your life – the sense of security you feel deep in your heart. You can become aware of it easily, just by sitting down with no distractions and noticing how at ease you feel, how peaceful you feel. How quickly does anxiety try to creep in? Can you just let it go, relax your body and not feel worry about anything?

Relaxing our heart is the number one spiritual practice we should engage with every day, because a tense heart is carrying fear, and it will influence everything we think, say, and choose to do. But if you consciously notice any tension inside, then you breathe and relax your body, with a specific awareness of your heart relaxing too, peace will come to you on the deepest level. We cannot feel peace when there is tension in our heart. We cannot feel truly secure if there is tension in our heart. Security and peace are the pre-requisites for happiness and joy. They are the foundation.

So address the foundation on a daily basis. Is it being weakened by anxiety, tension and fear, or is it strong, open and trusting? Develop the strength of your heart through daily physical activity, being in nature, healthy natural foods and laughter. Laughter is a great medicine for releasing the tension in our heart, and we all need it. Instead of watching the news, watch something that makes you laugh! Instead of talking about the gravity of civilisation with other adults, play with children whenever you can.

Adults often gather and talk serious, while the children are left to their own devices. Join the children; be silly, have fun, and you will remember the lighter side of life. You will remember the innocent child that is still within you, and you will remember the beautiful realm of your heart, which awaits your attention in this and every moment…

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