One of the very most important questions we need to ask ourselves every day is “How do I want to feel?”

Most people want to feel free, happy, enthusiastic, peaceful, loving, compassionate, joyful, relaxed, lighthearted and so on. They naturally want a positive feeling inside. We all do. So once we remind ourselves how we want to feel, rather than feeling at the mercy of our mind, our emotions, our environment and the behaviour of other people, we simply take the action that brings us to this positive feeling state. This is often as simple as relaxing our body and breathing more calmly and deeply. But it could also be spending some time in nature, listening to some inspiring and beautiful music, resolving an unspoken issue with a friend, helping someone who needs help, being generous with your time and your attention.

There are so many ways. And remember that the things you give your attention to will influence you. So if you watch the news, or a TV program where people are fighting or being unkind to each other, or if you listen to music that is depressing or angry, the way you feel is influenced by these things, even if you think it is not. We are far more sensitive than we believe.

And those things which we do every day influence us the most. Like the food we eat for example. If you want to feel more calm, patient and tolerant with others, then remove sugar and sweeteners from your diet, and eat more grounding greens and vegetables. If you want to feel more energised, eat less heavy food, like cooked food, cheese, potatoes, pasta etc, and eat more light food, like salads, smoothies, fruit etc. This is not a dietary lesson, just an illustration that food influences the way you feel. A person may say “I want to feel more energised” and then eat a big plate of pasta and cheese, followed by a pudding, and then fall asleep! We must be aware that choosing the food we eat is a huge part of feeling the way we want to feel. It cannot be overlooked, because it is so influential.

If you notice that you are often grumpy, irritable or dissatisfied, you might be okay with this and see no reason to change the way you feel, which is of course totally your choice.

But if you have had enough of feeling tired, depressed, irritable, unfulfilled or aimless in life, then the full power is in your hands to feel differently. Notice the thoughts that you are listening to (and believing) about life and about yourself every day. Notice your posture. Does your body tell the world that life has defeated you? Or do you stand tall and strong, with your shoulders back and relaxed, with your head up, ready to rise to the challenges that life brings your way?

Remember… this all effects the way you feel. And you can choose how you want to feel.

In this modern age, inspiring music, inspiring talks, inspiring people are available to listen to and watch at the press of a button on YouTube, on podcast sites and so on. If you give your attention to inspiring human expressions and inspirational media, you will feel inspired. Of course, there is a great deal of uninspiring (in fact, frightening and depressing) information that we could give our attention to, but our responsibility is to choose wisely, and there is literally nothing stopping us from doing so. We are free to make the choices that inspire us, bring us positive feelings, and encourage an optimistic perspective on the life that lies in front of us. It is really in our own hands and in our own hearts. We are the ones who are choosing where to put our attention, and thus we have full power to feel not only the way we want to feel, but the way that we know we are designed to feel. We are built for love, for kindness and for joy. We just need to choose the right influences.

• http://AlexanderBell.org

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“We are but children, innocently longing to find our way back
to the world of joy, freedom and happiness we once knew..”